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Biblical Baloney

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All-Female Cult Worships Vladimir Putin

Saturday, May 14th, 2011

Members of the sect that has sprung up in a Russian village some 250 miles southeast of Moscow believe that the 58-year-old macho Russian politician is on a special mission from God.

“According to the Bible, Paul the Apostle was a military commander at first and an evil persecutor of Christians before he started spreading the Christian gospel,” the sect’s founder, who styles herself Mother Fotina, said.

“In his days in the KGB, Putin also did some rather unrighteous things. But once he became president, he was imbued with the Holy Spirit, and just like the apostle, he started wisely leading his flock. It is hard for him now but he is fulfilling his heroic deed as an apostle.”

Reports from the sect’s headquarters close to the town of Nizhny Novgorod say that its members are all women who dress like nuns and pray for Mr Putin’s success in front of traditional Russian Orthodox Church icons that have been placed alongside a portrait of the Russian prime minister himself.

Followers are reportedly encouraged to sing upbeat patriotic Soviet songs at ‘services’ rather than hymns.

As befits a sect that worships a man who has denounced the decadence of the oligarchs, the sect’s members are said to survive on a Spartan diet of turnips, carrots, peas and buckwheat.

According to local media, Mother Fotina’s real name is Svetlana Frolova.

Father Alexei, the priest in the local village church, has dismissed the sect.

“Her so-called teachings are a nonsensical mixture of Orthodoxy, Catholicism, the occult, Buddhism and political information,” he said.

“But (Mother) Fotina does not come across as a mad person.”

Mr Putin’s spokesman said he was bemused.

“This is the first I’ve heard of such a religious group,” said Dmitry Peskov. “It is impressive that they think so highly of the prime minister’s work but I would like to recall another of the main commandments: thou shalt not worship false idols.”

A new political front created by Mr Putin meanwhile announced it may choose a candidate to run in the 2012 presidential election, in the latest sign the Russian strongman is eyeing a Kremlin return.

Mr Putin set up the Popular Front political movement to unify his supporters, from celebrities to pensioners alike. Dmitry Medvedev, the current president, vowed to respond to Mr Putin’s new coalition, by promising to create “other election alliances”, in the latest sign of a rivalry between the duo.

Source: www.telegraph.co.uk

 

 

The Exodus Story 2011 Style

Saturday, April 30th, 2011

Fake Metal Books Found In Cave Called Most Important Find In Christian History

Saturday, April 2nd, 2011

Via Derren Brown

BBC news reported recently: They could be the earliest Christian writing in existence, surviving almost 2,000 years in a Jordanian cave. They could, just possibly, change our understanding of how Jesus was crucified and resurrected, and how Christianity was born. A group of 70 or so “books”, each with between five and 15 lead leaves bound by lead rings, was apparently discovered in a remote arid valley in northern Jordan somewhere between 2005 and 2007. A flash flood had exposed two niches inside the cave, one of them marked with a menorah or candlestick, the ancient Jewish religious symbol.

A Jordanian Bedouin opened these plugs, and what he found inside might constitute extremely rare relics of early Christianity. The director of the Jordan’s Department of Antiquities, Ziad al-Saad, says the books might have been made by followers of Jesus in the few decades immediately following his crucifixion. “They will really match, and perhaps be more significant than, the Dead Sea Scrolls,” says Mr Saad. ”Maybe it will lead to further interpretation and authenticity checks of the material, but the initial information is very encouraging, and it seems that we are looking at a very important and significant discovery, maybe the most important discovery in the history of archaeology.”

However it turns out the are FAKE.

Peter Thonemann at Oxford has staked his career on the conclusion that the lead codices being discussed recently are forgeries executed within the last 50 years. The following is what he wrote to Elkington in an email after he was asked late last year to comment on the authenticity of the plates based on some photos:

A surprisingly easy task, as it turns out! The Greek text at the top of your photo no. 0556 reads: ΛΛΥΠΕΧΛΙΡΕΛΒΓΛΡΟΚΛΙΕΙΣΙΩΝ, followed by ΛΛΥΠΕ in mirror-writing.

This text corresponds to ΛΛΥΠΕ ΧΛΙΡΕ ΛΒΓΛΡ Ο ΚΛΙ ΕΙΣΙΩΝ, i.e. ἄλυπε χαῖρε, Ἀβγαρ ὁ καὶ Εἰσίων, followed by the word ἄλυπε again, in mirror writing. The text at the bottom of your photo no. 0532 is the first part of the same text again: ΛΥΠΕΧΛΙΡΕΛΒΓ, i.e. [ἄ]λυπε χαῖρε, Ἀβγ…

The text was incised by someone who did not know the Greek language, since he does not distinguish between the letters lambda and alpha: both are simply represented, in each of the texts, by the shape Λ. The text literally means ‘without grief, farewell! Abgar also known as Eision’. This text, in isolation, is meaningless.

The original News article at the BBC here.

Peter Thonemann on the Lead Codices refutation here.

 

 

Does It Really Matter Who Wrote The Bible?

Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

Apart from the most rabid fundamentalists among us, nearly everyone admits that the Bible might contain errors — a faulty creation story here, a historical mistake there, a contradiction or two in some other place. But is it possible that the problem is worse than that — that the Bible actually contains lies?

Most people wouldn’t put it that way, since the Bible is, after all, sacred Scripture for millions on our planet. But good Christian scholars of the Bible, including the top Protestant and Catholic scholars of America, will tell you that the Bible is full of lies, even if they refuse to use the term. And here is the truth: Many of the books of the New Testament were written by people who lied about their identity, claiming to be a famous apostle — Peter, Paul or James — knowing full well they were someone else. In modern parlance, that is a lie, and a book written by someone who lies about his identity is a forgery.

Most modern scholars of the Bible shy away from these terms, and for understandable reasons, some having to do with their clientele. Teaching in Christian seminaries, or to largely Christian undergraduate populations, who wants to denigrate the cherished texts of Scripture by calling them forgeries built on lies? And so scholars use a different term for this phenomenon and call such books “pseudepigrapha.”

You will find this antiseptic term throughout the writings of modern scholars of the Bible. It’s the term used in university classes on the New Testament, and in seminary courses, and in Ph.D. seminars. What the people who use the term do not tell you is that it literally means “writing that is inscribed with a lie.”

And that’s what such writings are. Whoever wrote the New Testament book of 2 Peter claimed to be Peter. But scholars everywhere — except for our friends among the fundamentalists — will tell you that there is no way on God’s green earth that Peter wrote the book. Someone else wrote it claiming to be Peter. Scholars may also tell you that it was an acceptable practice in the ancient world for someone to write a book in the name of someone else. But that is where they are wrong. If you look at what ancient people actually said about the practice, you’ll see that they invariably called it lying and condemned it as a deceitful practice, even in Christian circles. 2 Peter was finally accepted into the New Testament because the church fathers, centuries later, were convinced that Peter wrote it. But he didn’t. Someone else did. And that someone else lied about his identity.

The same is true of many of the letters allegedly written by Paul. Most scholars will tell you that whereas seven of the 13 letters that go under Paul’s name are his, the other six are not. Their authors merely claimed to be Paul. In the ancient world, books like that were labeled as pseudoi — lies.

This may all seem like a bit of antiquarian curiosity, especially for people whose lives don’t depend on the Bible or even people of faith for whom biblical matters are a peripheral interest at best. But in fact, it matters sometimes. Whoever wrote the book of 1 Timothy claimed to be Paul. But he was lying about that — he was someone else living after Paul had died. In his book, the author of 1 Timothy used Paul’s name and authority to address a problem that he saw in the church. Women were speaking out, exercising authority and teaching men. That had to stop. The author told women to be silent and submissive, and reminded his readers about what happened the first time a woman was allowed to exercise authority over a man, in that little incident in the garden of Eden. No, the author argued, if women wanted to be saved, they were to have babies (1 Tim. 2:11-15).

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Poll: 38% of Americans Believe Devastation of Japan God’s Wrath

Saturday, March 26th, 2011

A recently released Public Public Religion Research Institute poll show that nearly 40% of Americans believe that the recent earthquakes in Japan and the tsunami that followed were caused by direct retribution from God.

Marjoe: Watch As Child Preacher Becomes A Con-Artist

Sunday, March 20th, 2011

Marjoe was a precocious child preacher with extraordinary talents, who was immensely popular in the American South. His parents earned large sums of money off him up until the point he outgrew his novelty. Marjoe rejoined the ministry as a young adult solely as a means of earning a living, and not as a believer; he spent the next several years using his fame and status as an evangelist to defraud a small fortune out of individuals both through tent revivals and televangelism.

Eventually, Marjoe suffered a crisis of conscience and decided to renounce his ways, offering the documentary film crew unrestricted access to him during his final revival tour, repeatedly admitting on camera that he was a con-artist and revealing the tactics used by himself and other evangelists to swindle money from people.

Watch Marjoe here:

Publisher Sues ‘Faith Healer’ Benny Hinn For Immorality

Tuesday, March 8th, 2011

Scam artist “faith healer” and mega-millionaire Pastor Benny Hinn is being sued by a Christian book publisher who says Hinn violated the “immorality” clause in their contract when he had an adulterous affair with fellow preacher Paula White.

In August, Hinn admitted to a friendship with evangelist Paula White after The National Enquirer published photos of them in Rome, holding hands. Hinn was married at the time. His wife, Suzanne, had filed for divorce a few months earlier. Three years earlier, Hinn had signed a three-book deal with Strang Communications Co. of Lake Mary. He was paid a $300,000 advance on the first one, “Blood in the Sand,” according to the suit. Hinn acknowledged to his publisher “his inappropriate relationship” with White in August, according to the suit, and agreed that the publisher should get back its money, but he has yet to pay up.

Hinn is estimated to be worth hundreds of millions, money largely scraped out of the Social Security checks of the gullible elderly and the desperately ill. He travels the world in a $36M personal Gulfstream jet in between stays at his numerous opulent mansions.

William Lobdell Unmasks Benny Hinn

Was Moses on Shrooms?

Saturday, March 5th, 2011

High on Mount Sinai, Moses was on psychedelic drugs when he heard God deliver the Ten Commandments, an Israeli researcher claimed in a study published this week.

Such mind-altering substances formed an integral part of the religious rites of Israelites in biblical times, Benny Shanon, a professor of cognitive psychology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem wrote in the Time and Mind journal of philosophy.

“As far Moses on Mount Sinai is concerned, it was either a supernatural cosmic event, which I don’t believe, or a legend, which I don’t believe either, or finally, and this is very probable, an event that joined Moses and the people of Israel under the effect of narcotics,” Shanon told Israeli public radio on Tuesday.

Moses was probably also on drugs when he saw the “burning bush,” suggested Shanon, who said he himself has dabbled with such substances.

“The Bible says people see sounds, and that is a clasic phenomenon,” he said citing the example of religious ceremonies in the Amazon in which drugs are used that induce people to “see music.”

He mentioned his own experience when he used ayahuasca, a powerful psychotropic plant, during a religious ceremony in Brazil’s Amazon forest in 1991. “I experienced visions that had spiritual-religious connotations,” Shanon said.

He said the psychedelic effects of ayahuasca were comparable to those produced by concoctions based on bark of the acacia tree, that is frequently mentioned in the Bible.

Mushrooms.

Drugs weren’t invented yesterday, you know. In fact, they grow right up out of the ground, all on their own. The area surrounding Mt Sinai, for example, was home to two common psychedelic drugs and, according to a 2008 Time and Mind article written by Benny Shanon, a professor at Jerusalem’s Hebrew University, psychedelic mushrooms and other mind-altering substances played a hugerole in the religious rites of Israelites during Biblical times.

While it would be irresponsible of us to assume Moses was drugged up based solely on the fact that drugs were both acceptable and available at the time, Professor Shanon maintains that the scene described in Exodus, (involving blaring trumpets, bright lighting and thunder), fits the “classic imaginings of people on drugs” and further that “the seeing of light [that occurs in hallucinations] is accompanied by profound religious and spiritual feelings.”

Why It Makes Sense:

The evidence isn’t completely conclusive, but a closer look at our choices leads to a fairly obvious answer. Either:

1. God visited Moses and decided that he was the perfect spokesman for his commandments, (despite Moses’s total lack of previous experience in the supernatural-commandment-liaison department), and all of Moses’s friends and family believed him when he said “God spoke to me” and instantly stopped coveting shit.

Or

2. A group of extremely bored Israelites ate a bunch of easily-accessible mushrooms and imagined a bunch of crazy shit.

Source: Cracked.com and breitbart.com

 

‘Adopt A Terrorist For Prayer’ Website Wants Us To Love Our Enemies

Saturday, February 26th, 2011

A recent CNN story is drawing attention to the little-known Adopt-a-Terrorist website, which urges Christians to take literally the injunction to love their enemies in hopes of spiritually reforming them through prayer.

The group’s spokesman, Thomas Bruce, told CNN that his site has been offering its interactive adoption feature since 2009. So far, 603 people have registered to adopt a terrorist, with some names, like Osama bin Laden, drawing multiple sponsors. Another 165 names drawn from FBI and State Department listings are currently listed as open for adoption.

“We’ve been fighting this [war on terror] for about 10 years with material means, and it hasn’t really changed the nature of it,” Bruce told CNN. “By bringing spiritual perspective to it, and as the Lord answers some of those prayers, it could and should hopefully have a profound change on the viciousness of the conflict we’re in.”

As a further inducement to potential members, the site suggests that “associating with this movement marks you as one who is not afraid of either Satan or his minions. It raises your profile in the spiritual realm.”

It appears that the chief goal of the site is not to change the hearts of terrorists, however, but to turn them to Jesus. Sample prayers include such formulas as “Holy Spirit, relentlessly pursue Al Zawahiri to the depths of his hideout, that he may not escape your grace” and “Father, provide an environment to Jamal Ahmed in which he is free to confess and believe in Jesus as Lord openly” and “Jesus, may news of your free gift of eternal salvation reach the opened ears of Rahman Yasin.”

When CNN asked why all the terrorists listed had ties to Islam, Bruce replied that “while he’s considered adding Christian or even eco terrorists to the list, they ‘aren’t a big threat to national security, our way of life, or our freedom. We should pray for them too, but the movement doesn’t threaten existentially our existence the same way the Islamic terrorists do.’”

 

Stories From The Old Testament

Wednesday, February 2nd, 2011